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i’ve come undone

It happened…

Running barefoot on pavement

Hot sun on my back

Blue shirt, blue eyes, blue sky

The tie in my hair comes loose

I feel a tousle of clean hair, fall limp around my shoulders

it bounces with each step.

little girls in pigtails and braids dance an image across my mind

Looking back

eyes scan

for that safe thing to tie me up

tie me down

keep things from changing

but it is lost,

on a sticky grey slab of pavement, decorated with middle class homes and green front lawns.

hair loose around bare shoulders

I stand

in the middle of our street

feeling like a stranger in my own neighborhood.

I run for the house, the house that is loosing its warmth with each day passed

and that’s when I realize nothing is safe anymore

soon our home will belong to someone else

and we’ll be strangers,

aliens,

living on the lake,

trying to stay united

trying to bloom like the flowers in the back garden,

with our centers pointed towards the heavens

home now

I catch my reflection in the side panel of my truck

I recognize myself somewhere between girl and woman

hair loose

wild eyes

fear escapes me and drifts to the place of my hair tie,

another lost part of me

time passes so fast and so slow, all at once.

I’ve left my hair down

in the hush of the moon

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9 responses

  1. So many images—thoughts and questions are skipping through my head—-I saw myself.
    Wonderful writing.

    August 13, 2010 at 3:01 am

  2. It’s late, and I only meant to read one of your posts, but they’re so good I couldn’t stop. I love your imaginitive writing. Glad to meet you.

    August 13, 2010 at 3:37 am

  3. there it is.
    the coming undone.
    the hope to hold it all together and reality slipping around the edges of your thoughts.
    beautiful, painful, truth.

    thank you for this open sharing.

    August 13, 2010 at 4:18 am

  4. friend, i love this, and the way you write… you are a wordsmith. and i encourage you to find home in the people you love, versus any place. i too have had to do this, and to be this for my little one… home, made of flesh and voice, versus mortar and walls. love you. e.

    August 13, 2010 at 4:48 am

  5. Painful and lovely–the letting go. Glad I stopped by from emily’s.

    August 13, 2010 at 12:49 pm

  6. I understand. It is a bit frightening – this business of change. You have written it so beautifully.

    August 13, 2010 at 2:26 pm

  7. This is gorgeous… I love your words!!!

    August 16, 2010 at 3:48 pm

  8. “With our centers pointed towards the heavens . . .” Yes! May it always be.

    August 16, 2010 at 7:03 pm

  9. you spill over good , gorgeous

    August 20, 2010 at 1:37 pm

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